I began my life in two places. In one place I was surrounded by thousands of wiggling morons that looked and acted just like me but not quite like me and to be quite honest it was hot and claustrophobic and I had this urge to escape and be free.
My other beginning was in a lonely place, a large lonely place where I clung to a wall of some sort as if my life depended on it.
Then, one day my wiggly self felt something it had never felt before. A tremendous sense of pressure and an opening where there had been none before. I shot towards this opening in a feverish desire to escape this room of copycats and woosh! I went through the tube and landed in a place much different than I had ever experienced. I noticed that my fellow wiggly's were mimicking me and following me. NO! my being screamed and I wiggled and swam with all my might trying to get as far away from that vile brood as I could.
Now, this is where the other part of me, Sphere, comes back into the story. I was desolate. Desolate and lonely. I had clung to this wall for what seemed like ages. I was starting to give up hope and was considering throwing myself from the wall and ending it all. Suddenly, there was this violent quake that went on for what seemed like forever and in my fear I clung tighter to the wall and realized i did want to live. The quake subsided. I hung there fatigued. So lonely and wishing something, someone could rescue me.
This is where I, Wiggly, come back into the story. I had swam with all my might for days and although I had out distanced those bloody mimics I could not gain any more space and was about to despair when I noticed before me a large wall with a spherical object that looked large enough for me to hide in. If I couldn't out-wiggle the others, I would outsmart them.
I swam towards the strange sphere and noticed that it was alive. Not only alive but speaking to me.
"At last At last!", the Sphere cried, " You've come to save me from my loneliness.
I didn't know what the hell that meant. The concept of loneliness is a hard thing to conceive when you've grown up in a tiny space filled with thousands of morons.
"Please stay with me forever!", the Sphere cried.
I thought to myself well, this sphere is different and I don't know what forever means...
I said to the Sphere, "Yes, on the condition that you hide me from the others."
"The others?", she asked.
"Not Important.", I replied.
"Well, how can I hide you for I dare not let go of this wall lest I plummet to a most tragic end."
I ruminated this for a couple seconds...
"Well you look sort of hollow and for some reason it seems to me that I would fit nicely inside. Actually for some reason I feel compelled to be inside, weird"
"What a splendid plan!", cried Sphere. "I too feel the yearning to embrace you in my innermost self"
And so we became one.
37 years later here I am typing some inane story a self proclaimed video game addict and book devouring extraordinaire.
There's your bloody biography.