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Uncharted Territory
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Re: Thoughts on why some are disrespectful in Social Gaming/Home

Jan 3, 2013

"Rudeness is the weak man's imitation of strength....Passionate hatred can give meaning and purpose to an empty life."  --Eric Hoffer

 

 

It's easy to be rude and descend to a level of vicious personal attacks when one is conveniently and safely anonymous. Where the threat of repercussion is high -- social ostracism, physical violence, etc. -- people have a tendency to more carefully choose their words and actions; where the threat of repercussion is low, and there is less perceived penalty for indulging in such poor behavior, it inevitably becomes an environment in which the overall level of dialogue is denuded.

 

Social MMO experiences, such as Home, suffer from a logistics problem: the ratio of moderators to populace is typically very low due to the overhead required. Maintaining a moderator-to-user ratio of, say, 1:426 (which is the City of Los Angeles police-to-population ratio), would be fiscally prohibitive. Thus, the best thing that can be done in Home is to utilize the blocking tools which have been provided to us (and have, blessedly, been recently enhanced). Ignoring and Blocking are two wonderful features which the user can and should avail themselves of.

 

In the case of an online forum, the tone is largely set by where moderation policy draws the line. Some online forums are "everything goes" environments, whereas others are very strictly monitored, and polite and civil discourse is rigorously enforced. For instance, if you're the service provider, do you allow a post which technically doesn't violate any Terms of Service, yet is nonetheless in poor taste (even if disguised with a specious veneer)? From such precedents, the level of discussion eventually finds its own level, just as water seeks its own level. Those who are comfortable with that level will continue to participate, while voices on either end of the spectrum will inevitably fall silent, either believing the environment to be too lax or too strict for their personal tastes.

 

To the question of how best to handle it: in any internet environment, someone can only affect you as much as you let them. So you have to decide for yourself what level of disrespectful environment you're willing to put up with, and the provider of the environment has to decide what level of revenue loss they're willing to accept with the parameters they set for its consumers to hopefully enjoy.

 

 

NorseGamer

Editor-in-Chief, HSM

www.hsmagazine.net

 

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Wastelander
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Re: Thoughts on why some are disrespectful in Social Gaming/Home

Jan 3, 2013

Pretty simple answer as many have already come a'respondin. :womanwink: I myself have lost it on a noob or 2 and have felt the cold steel of the ban hammer. :womanvery-happy: I have respectfully learned my lesson and moved on. I think an even more interesting question is, why (in a virtual world) do we take these insults so personally. Good topic

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Limit Breaker
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Re: Thoughts on why some are disrespectful in Social Gaming/Home

Jan 3, 2013

GenomeGirl_33 wrote:

Pretty simple answer as many have already come a'respondin. :womanwink: I myself have lost it on a noob or 2 and have felt the cold steel of the ban hammer. :womanvery-happy: I have respectfully learned my lesson and moved on. I think an even more interesting question is, why (in a virtual world) do we take these insults so personally. Good topic


''why (in a virtual world) do we take these insults so personally''

This is key and what I was looking for. Norse touched on it without knowing it. In  the forums we have had the opportunity to get to know eachother. More like a family so I have never taken offense. I feel like it's a family discussion. In Home when its a stranger going berzerk I feel like '' Hey, You don't know me and you're not going to take the time to so I will not take it personally.'' Very good point GG.

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Hekseville Citizen
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Re: Thoughts on why some are disrespectful in Social Gaming/Home

Jan 3, 2013

You'd be surprised by the people who say they try to be respectful aren't. They know nice passive aggressive ways to be disrespectful that keeps them from being banned. I prefer the straight up disrespect rather than the sneaky. Besides.. this is beating a dead horse to it's bones. Yeah, people tend to be more rude through a tv screen because they know they will get punched square in the chin otherwise.

 

People in Social Gaming can be annoying too. That can generate hate. Dealing with idiots isn't fun. It's irritating for people without patience. I think people shouldn't butt into a situation without understanding it's full nature. You may see fams being rude to an individual but that individual could also just block them. People with little to do in their everyday life get their kicks off the drama so they don't block them. I personally don't want the hassle or grievances. I honestly feel the only time someone should report someone.. is for game breaking or a full frontal assault of harassments.. not just for a petty argument. 

 

tl;dr - Ignore feature. Move on. people are people.


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Limit Breaker
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Re: Thoughts on why some are disrespectful in Social Gaming/Home

[ Edited ]
Jan 3, 2013

Pandaachan wrote:

You'd be surprised by the people who say they try to be respectful aren't. They know nice passive aggressive ways to be disrespectful that keeps them from being banned. I prefer the straight up disrespect rather than the sneaky. Besides.. this is beating a dead horse to it's bones. Yeah, people tend to be more rude through a tv screen because they know they will get punched square in the chin otherwise.

 

People in Social Gaming can be annoying too. That can generate hate. Dealing with idiots isn't fun. It's irritating for people without patience. I think people shouldn't butt into a situation without understanding it's full nature. You may see fams being rude to an individual but that individual could also just block them. People with little to do in their everyday life get their kicks off the drama so they don't block them. I personally don't want the hassle or grievances. I honestly feel the only time someone should report someone.. is for game breaking or a full frontal assault of harassments.. not just for a petty argument. 

 

tl;dr - Ignore feature. Move on. people are people.


 Some good points here. reporting because someone called you a rebel scum just adds to a moderators list of petty reports when they could be handling the Darth Vaders of Home. SE will be along soon. He loves Star Wars :smileyvery-happy:

 

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Fender Bender
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Re: Thoughts on why some are disrespectful in Social Gaming/Home

[ Edited ]
Jan 3, 2013

Some people are just plain mean. Oh, they can be nice when they want to but inside them lies something that causes their meanness to jump out. Maybe they were hurt in life or maybe it's a power grab. Holy smokes! Rich people, poor people, in-betweeners, it don't matter. Some people are just mean and while there may be an underlying physiological reason for it, it ain't likely some of them are gonna' change. 

Born in the U.S.A. - Bruce Springsteen
trolling is for fishing, not the forums



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Ghost of Sparta
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Re: Thoughts on why some are disrespectful in Social Gaming/Home

Jan 3, 2013

Kid_Fleetfoot wrote:

Some people are just plain mean. Oh, they can be nice when they want to but inside them lies something that causes their meanness to jump out. Maybe they were hurt in life or maybe it's a power grab. Holy smokes! Rich people, poor people, in-betweeners, it don't matter. Some people are just mean and while there may be an underlying physiological reason for it, it ain't likely some of them are gonna' change. 


As others have touched upon, I believe the sense of anonymity has much to do with it, but then it seems some have an inherent desire to assert their superiority also. Like Kid_Fleetfoot stated, it's something of a powergrab.

 

Having met a number of Forum regulars in Home, I'm often surprised by the way they conduct themselves. I try to greet everyone I recognize from the forums in the same manner which goes something like "Hello...I recognize your name from the forums.". Many are quite polite and we chat a bit, some surprise me greatly with how pleasant they are, others, are rude, or simply ignore.

 

This same behavior manifests itself on the forums. Many speak down to, or rather try to speak over the heads of the other members here. I have no trouble myself discerning the meaning of a convoluted reply that reads more like a thesis on economics or psychology rather than a post appropriate for this forum ( yes, that was my somewhat circumlocutious example...see what I mean?), but then I do find it insulting (or at the very best, ignorant) to use such a voice here. It seems some cannot help but attempt to demonstrate that they are above the rest and go as far as to not even respond except to those within their own little social circle. Such subtle disrespect from some of the supposed most "community-minded", but disrepect nonetheless.

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Re: Thoughts on why some are disrespectful in Social Gaming/Home

Jan 3, 2013

Here is the cynical answer, yet is most likely the accurate answer.

 

For the most part, the world is full of people who are selfish and stupid.  Just take a look around you.  Go to a store when a big sale is going on.  Take a look at the behavior of drivers on the road.

 

Most people are so lost in themselves and their own little world that they don't pay attention to the world around them, or the other people in it.  And they are so vacuous, that they can't grasp how their own actions effect any of the people around them that they have bothered to notice.

 

Personal responsibility is at an all time low.  Everyone blames other people and circumstances for troubles that arise from their own actions or lack there of.  "My child is screwed up because of Video Games, movies, their teachers, anything but me being a bad parent."

 

We are in a world where science is starting to find statistically that the average person is getting less intelligent.

 

These vast number of troglodytes that infest this world only learn societal rules of engagement through negative re-enforcement.  Whenever they break these rules something bad happens to them, so they don't break them.

 

A simple method of learning that is effective even on the most simple minded of animal species.  Yet most people even push the limits of it's effectiveness in the real world.

 

You now stick these people into an environment where there is pretty much no negative repercussions to their default base characteristics, and what does that teach them.  The rules of society that they are forced to follow do not apply here.

 

Take a look at the world we live in.  You will find your answer.  We live in a world where we foster self absorption like it was some kind of virtue.  Where we tell every child they are special, with out giving them any context for the affirmation, and then spoil them rotten to illustrate the point.

 

Where we reward selfish immaturity and unintelligence with fame and fortune, by giving them reality TV contracts and Paparazzi celebrity status.

 

The average child now, when asked what they are going to be when they grow up, are giving the answer of "famous".  Like Famous is a career.  Then as they grow up they feel as though they are entitled to that fame.

 

We live in a world where teenagers think updating their Facebook Status is more important than schooling.  As if people really care what they are doing from minute to minute, like they are the center of the universe.

 

We breed self indulgence and intellectual laziness.  These people haven't got the faintest idea what their real place in a society is, or why it's rules exist.  They just know that if they are caught breaking them, the fun comes to an end.  To them honor is a foreign concept.  I mean they honestly think they are better than everyone else.

 

And then we wonder why, when they are introduced into a societal environment where following the rules is based on the honor system, these people act like anarchists.

 

The reasons are on every Television, Computer Screen, and Smart Phone out there.  Just look around.

 

 

 

.

 


 


 


 


Be One With The Game.

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Wastelander
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Re: Thoughts on why some are disrespectful in Social Gaming/Home

Jan 3, 2013

The-Sarge wrote:

Here is the cynical answer, yet is most likely the accurate answer.

 

For the most part, the world is full of people who are selfish and stupid.  Just take a look around you.  Go to a store when a big sale is going on.  Take a look at the behavior of drivers on the road.

 

Most people are so lost in themselves and their own little world that they don't pay attention to the world around them, or the other people in it.  And they are so vacuous, that they can't grasp how their own actions effect any of the people around them that they have bothered to notice.

 

Personal responsibility is at an all time low.  Everyone blames other people and circumstances for troubles that arise from their own actions or lack there of.  "My child is screwed up because of Video Games, movies, their teachers, anything but me being a bad parent."

 

We are in a world where science is starting to find statistically that the average person is getting less intelligent.

 

These vast number of troglodytes that infest this world only learn societal rules of engagement through negative re-enforcement.  Whenever they break these rules something bad happens to them, so they don't break them.

 

A simple method of learning that is effective even on the most simple minded of animal species.  Yet most people even push the limits of it's effectiveness in the real world.

 

You now stick these people into an environment where there is pretty much no negative repercussions to their default base characteristics, and what does that teach them.  The rules of society that they are forced to follow do not apply here.

 

Take a look at the world we live in.  You will find your answer.  We live in a world where we foster self absorption like it was some kind of virtue.  Where we tell every child they are special, with out giving them any context for the affirmation, and then spoil them rotten to illustrate the point.

 

Where we reward selfish immaturity and unintelligence with fame and fortune, by giving them reality TV contracts and Paparazzi celebrity status.

 

The average child now, when asked what they are going to be when they grow up, are giving the answer of "famous".  Like Famous is a career.  Then as they grow up they feel as though they are entitled to that fame.

 

We live in a world where teenagers think updating their Facebook Status is more important than schooling.  As if people really care what they are doing from minute to minute, like they are the center of the universe.

 

We breed self indulgence and intellectual laziness.  These people haven't got the faintest idea what their real place in a society is, or why it's rules exist.  They just know that if they are caught breaking them, the fun comes to an end.  To them honor is a foreign concept.  I mean they honestly think they are better than everyone else.

 

And then we wonder why, when they are introduced into a societal environment where following the rules is based on the honor system, these people act like anarchists.

 

The reasons are on every Television, Computer Screen, and Smart Phone out there.  Just look around.

 

 

 

.


you win...all of my internets...

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Fender Bender
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Re: Thoughts on why some are disrespectful in Social Gaming/Home

[ Edited ]
Jan 3, 2013

Jersquall wrote:

 

 When you meet someone in the real world it would be strange to see them be disrespectful in public right off the bat. Why do you think some Social Gaming/Home users are this way? How do you handle it? How do we find resolution to this issue? Discussion is yours.


I agree that the anonymity of our virtual world, allows a person to hide from repercussions of their antisocial behavior. But their behavior is more deeply rooted, in that people use gaming to get away and to diffuse frustrations of everyday life. Whether it be a 14 year old or 40 year old, many are displacing their feelings of powerlessness. Some people channel their aggressiveness and discord through sports, shopping, hiking, etc. Gamers use games that are often violent to vent their rage from everyday insults.

 

Do all of us use games to vent frustration? No, some of us just enjoy the feelings of mastering a new game, gaining trophies, making friends, and reaching new levels. How do the less aggressive, peace lovers handle the more aggressive members of our social gaming world? For the most part, I try to use the tools provided to counter their antisocial ways. Occasionally their remarks and insults get the best of me, so I vent with friends or take a break from the forum. But Home is my daily reward, so I just ignore people who are determined to ruin my good time.

 

With that said, we now come together in a "social gaming" platform called Home plus discuss this environment on this forum. Again, all done with the veil of anonymity to shield us from real life consequences. We then wonder why some people are disrespectful, immature or rude? It is a perfect formula for conflict and discord for many who do not wish to "live in harmony" or who are venting their rage from everyday life.

 

Long term resolution to this issue, is within each of us. But each member of our community, would have to take responsibility for their actions and words. Will this happen? Not in the real or virtual world. How can I add to the solution? By understanding that being human, means we make mistakes. We often strike out in fear, powerlessness, or pure instinctual emotion. To understand, that each of us has the best and the worst of humanity inside. Maybe by looking at my own behavior first and being responsible for it, will start a movement for better relations in our world called Home.

 

 

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