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Oct 26 2009
By: Mr_Lochwood I Only Post Everything 1002 posts
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Not the lesser man!

80 replies 22 views Edited Oct 26, 2009

     Hello all,

 

     The Mrs and I have been using Home for some time now and we are aware that there is a harassment issue on Home. We are also aware that all of you are aware of the problem as well. This post is not to shed light on an already know situation, but I will get to my point farther on.

 

     The Mrs and I were sitting on a bench chilling in a space and chatting with some friends when this fellow comes up and squats down with his face in the Mrs's avatars crotch and starts making disgusting sounds and perverted statements doing the agreement emote. Now obviously this is not the first time we had seen such behavior, that is not my point here. I told the fellow to move and stop or he would be reported for sexual harassment. He, to my amazement, complied. Whereupon, this random fellow comes up and calls me something I can not repeat here but was an insult as to my being less of a man for getting upset over a game. I must be jealous, weak, a nerd etc... He went on. Now I muted the fellow and ignored him, but it is this I would like to address.

 

     Many people will say, "Oh, stop crying" or "Cut, the whining. Just ignore them. It happens to everyone" or a plethora of other less than helpful statements. However let me assure you I am not crying or whining and I am used to it and do ignore them. What I am doing is making a statement: If you sexually harass my wife and do not stop when warned, then you will be reported. You can call me crybaby, nerd, narc, or inform me Home is just a game, but when my wife smiles at me and tells me how much she loves me for protecting her, that is the words and opinion I am going to take. I encourage you all to do just the same. Don't put up with harassment of any kind. If we all stand together and report when needed and move on, Home will become a better place.

 

Happy Home Days to you all always!

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Wastelander
Registered: 01/08/2008
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Re: Not the lesser man!

Oct 26, 2009
The Hammer of the Home Mods will strike down this preverted User with epic justice!..
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Wastelander
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Re: Not the lesser man!

Oct 26, 2009
giggle!
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Fender Bender
Registered: 10/16/2007
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Re: Not the lesser man!

Oct 26, 2009
Standing up for your wife, whether it be in the real world or in the virtual one, only reaffirms the fact that you're a real man and most certainly not a coward.
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Lombax Warrior
Registered: 06/10/2008
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Re: Not the lesser man!

Oct 26, 2009
it all boils down to respect. just because home isn't real and all you see is an avatar doesn't mean that the person behind that avatar isn't real. if everyone shows respect, then disrespect will become extinct
Too tired to sleep
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Lombax Warrior
Registered: 11/25/2008
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Re: Not the lesser man!

Oct 26, 2009

Some people just can't be around other people, whether in real life or on the internet. Damn shame that it's like this and, though it might've seemed funny to some people watching, is really perverted and uncalled for. Kudos to you for standing up for your wife.

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Uncharted Territory
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Re: Not the lesser man!

Oct 26, 2009
I must say that I have never experianced that, yet the oposite I see harrasment from time to time and try to help out the person from being harrased and get flooded with people, not just females, who are surprised to see a stranger trying to stop it. There will always be a guy who will call you down though for trying to help out but it usually ends up that they too are a rude person too. You have always been a great help to the home comunity, to people here and even people you only see one time and never again. Always remember it takes more effort to be good, which you must have a degree in by now, Dr Lochwood giggle =D.
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Hekseville Citizen
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Re: Not the lesser man!

Oct 26, 2009

I think posting this was exceptionally unwise. a reaction like this is exactly the kind of reinforcement pre-teens wet their pants about, and an adult should know better than to aggrivate matters to the point of ridiculousness.

 

 

it's so conveniant to say that typical advice is unhelpful, and it frustrates me to see you complicate things, but let me try to be constructive. i would suggest you try to analyze the type of exchanges that are going on here.

 

to reduce the frequency of a behavior, there are a few things to think about:

 

positive reinforcement: if the behavior stops, something good will occur

negative reinforcement: if the behavior doesn't stop, something bad will occur (punishment)

 

ignoring someone is a form of punishment.

 

positive reinforcement stimulates more, typically good, behavior.

negative reinforcement, such as a threat, often aggrivates the behavior.

punishment may inititially cause an increase in behavior.

punishment will not stimulate any new behavior, good or bad. only reinforcement stimulates behavior.

 

the biggest mistake you can make is assume that harrassment is the discourse of a fool. 

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I Only Post Everything
Registered: 06/05/2009
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Re: Not the lesser man!

Oct 26, 2009

ohnomothra wrote:

I think posting this was exceptionally unwise. a reaction like this is exactly the kind of reinforcement pre-teens wet their pants about, and an adult should know better than to aggrivate matters to the point of ridiculousness.

 

 

it's so conveniant to say that typical advice is unhelpful, and it frustrates me to see you complicate things, but let me try to be constructive. i would suggest you try to analyze the type of exchanges that are going on here.

 

to reduce the frequency of a behavior, there are a few things to think about:

 

positive reinforcement: if the behavior stops, something good will occur

negative reinforcement: if the behavior doesn't stop, something bad will occur (punishment)

 

ignoring someone is a form of punishment.

 

positive reinforcement stimulates more, typically good, behavior.

negative reinforcement, such as a threat, often aggrivates the behavior.

punishment may inititially cause an increase in behavior.

punishment will not stimulate any new behavior, good or bad. only reinforcement stimulates behavior.

 

the biggest mistake you can make is assume that harrassment is the discourse of a fool. 


 

      I think you might want to read my OP. The only reaction I had was, as I said, to ask the fellow to stop or be reported, as the moderation team has informed me is best to do - always good to let a person choose if they wish to be reported or not, and to mute the fellow that was verbally attacking me. How it is confusing to tell people that I will not tolerate harassment and neither should they? And if you think for one minute I am going to positively reinforce someone who is sexually harassing my wife, again I think you need to read my OP. Furthermore, I did not assume the behavior was the discourse of a fool or otherwise. To me people are people. I may not like there actions, but the people themselves are as worthy of respect and love as any of us.

 

Happy Home Days to you all always!

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VP of Gaming
Registered: 02/15/2003
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Re: Not the lesser man!

Oct 26, 2009

ohnomothra wrote:

ignoring someone is a form of punishment. 


Just putting someone on Ignore is only ignoring the problem. It allows them to move on and continue their bad behavior on someone else.

 

Putting someone on Ignore should be considered as one step in dealing with the immediate problem. Reporting them to a Moderator is the step that will either lead to their changing their way of interacting with the rest of the community or their removal from Home. How they decide to act after their encounter with an official (whether as a warning, suspension or actual meeting with a Moderator) will determine their future in Home. It is up to the offender whether they will continue to be a part of the Home community based their own behavior. 

Message Edited by Conrad_Max on 10-26-2009 05:37 AM
The way you play the game is the way you live your life.

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