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Jun 20 2012
By: rwlove Monster Hunter 38 posts
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Playstation changed me and saved me

4 replies 37 views Edited Jun 20, 2012

A while back i made a post of how much fun ive had with playstation, not thinking about how much it has helped me. I once used to be a quiet kid that would get bullied, picked on and disliked for not saying anything.  When it came to talking to people i would sometimes studder and not be able to keep a conversation going.  All i had was my knowledge and a few friends who i barely hung out with. Whats funny is i wasnt always like that my father died when i was six, it borke my heart and i still think about almost everyday but it wasnt enough to make go quiet and emo-like, what changed me was two teachers i had. The first one was the worst teacher you could possibly imagine she actually was the first one whoever made fun of or picked on me. She would punish me as soon as she got a chance to and it would be over little things to the point where one student once had to stop her by telling her parents and the principle. At the time i was also in an after school program and this teacher would even have one of her students follow me and she would tell the teacher whatever i did and the teacher would punish me during school for it. The second teacher also made fun of me but she didnt punish me for anything. Between those two teachers and the students i got bullied by they lowered my self-esteem down, made me feel like i was alone and made me a bit suicidal for a while. One of the one things that helped me cope with all the bullying from other students after that was when i got a ps2. i first played a ps2 when i went to my cousins house, they made me love it so much that i decided i needed one for myself. It helped me for the longest as a stress reliever and helped me become more creative when it came to writing stories and drawing, i still have it right next to my ps3.  I got my Ps3 maybe a few months to a year and a half after it came out with my first games being the incredible hulk, devil may cry 4, and call of duty 4 modern warfare. when i started hearing people with mics i would laugh to myself and call them idiots with mics. After a while i got myself a mic but almost never used it.  I also got a psp and i would play it at school, while playing it people would occasionally ask me if i had a ps3 then we would exchange psn names and play games together when i started talking on my mic we would make jokes and one day one of them said to me "dude if i only knew you on psn i would never think this was you in real life why dont you act like this at school you're hilarious."  Of course my self-esteem wasnt high enough to be myself outside of games. i have met and kept in touch with some of my best friends through psn, i have also gotten some of the best advice and counseling through psn.  The best advice/counseling I have ever gotten on psn that i want to pass on was to think of the people that pick on me or make fun of me as people online that talk trash, in the end the match will be over and ill probaly never seE them again or i wont care about them or who they were. To help me get over my suicidal thoughts a friend of mine on psn told me to think of something i love, want to do, or have to finish and think about it when ever i have suicidal thoughts. Now instead of suicide i think, "meh i have too many games to play and beat before i die and i refuse to die before they finish final fantasy versus 13 or the kingdom hearts series." Psn slowly helped me become more outgoing.  I have many friends now and i will continue to gain more thanks to psns help with improving me. I remember when I had an award ceremony back in middle school the only people screaming for me was my family when i got called up to recieve my awards, when i graduated highschool a few weeks ago I heard so many voices  yelling my name, they were fellow students, teachers, and my family, it made me feel good about myself.  It only does counseling,self-improvement, relieve stress, help make friends, everything. Thank you psn and everyone on psn who has helped me out. 

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PlayStation MVP
Registered: 09/13/2007
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Re: Playstation changed me and saved me

Jun 15, 2012

Good story. Happy to read how much you have come out of your shell. I too was one of those people in my youth. It wasn't until I got my first job at 16 (at a movie theatre) that I became much more social.

Stay positive. It will get better. And just keep telling yourself you have too much to look forward to and think of all the great things you would miss out on, if you were to leave this world pre-maturely.

"You must make a friend of horror. Horror and moral terror are your friends. If they are not then they are enemies to be feared."


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Hekseville Citizen
Registered: 12/25/2007
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Re: Playstation changed me and saved me

Jun 15, 2012

I'm glad everything worked out for ya! I grew up very anti social and depressed, and it was the escape from reality that my playstation 2 provided that kept me plowing through childhood and even adulthood. I see abit of similarity in our stories there

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Monster Hunter
Registered: 10/13/2009
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Re: Playstation changed me and saved me

Jun 15, 2012

Wow, great story. It is great that things are getting better for you. Do you mind if I add you as a friend? You seem like a nice person. I don't have a PS3 anymore but I have a PS Vita. And I can add you on that, if you dont mind.

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Monster Hunter
Registered: 07/01/2011
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Re: Playstation changed me and saved me

Jun 15, 2012

sure go ahead and add me, the more friends the better, and im always glad to know there are others like me who were in a shell and able to overcome it

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