02-12-2013 02:13 PM
Ok, let me get something straight. I don’t hate this game; I don’t even dislike it! I love the story, the graphics and gameplay, even though there is a glitch in one of Bentley’s hacking thingies where the jetpack turtle character is constantly looking up and flying up automatically, which is annoying, I’d say this game deserves a 9/10. There are a couple of turnoffs in the game, so brace yourself because if you liked the ancestor Bob or didn’t give a rat’s **bleep** cheeks about a character that was completely turned backwards in this game then don’t read this! For those who are curious of what I have to say… This is my review for Sly: Thieves in time!
You may have noticed the first thing about Sly is that his face has been changed a bit. That’s not what’s disturbing me, although, I would prefer that long muzzle look to him rather than a goatee look, his gameplay is very fun and it never gets old. The other characters went through a makeover also; Bentley and Murray look a little different but at least their gameplay is awesome!
In just three days I have beaten the game and have given it a 9/10… but the first turnoff that I saw was an ancestor that didn’t look pretty to me, in fact, he looks like a big gorilla with the head and tail of a raccoon. While you’re wondering how he could steal from pockets with a bone, his character looks so ugly, I almost went blind looking at him.
Now to be fair, his character had some neat moves like climbing up icy walls, the same exact move Sly had in the second game when his cane split into a duel-cane to use as icepicks to get up an icy wall. Why they chose a different, not to mention, ugly character to use that move is beyond me.
Now at first I thought “That must be Sleigh McCooper, the Scottish ancestor!” but nope… It’s not.
There are actually four original ancestors in this game and one Sanzaru pulled right out of their **bleep** is thrown in there! A caveman raccoon named Bob! God he looks ugly! If only he was a lot smaller and good looking like Sly then I wouldn’t have gave a **bleep** about his Flintstone get-up or the bone that doesn’t even look like a cane! Even though Sleigh is almost the same size as Bod, at least he wouldn’t look so **bleep** UGLY!
Besides that turnoff, everything about the environment in the third hub world looks gorgeous like the other levels, even though I think dinosaurs shouldn’t be in it with ice age creatures (for scientific reasons unless you like merging eras).
I love the snow, I love the villain and I love a lot of things about the whole level.
Now if you even gave any inkling about the third game at all, you’d be just as gobsmacked as I was when you have found out about a character from the third game that got completely turn from 100% positive to 100% negative just like that. What character am I’m talking about?
Black Baron: “Ghaa… a fetal blow…” (Smoke blows away to reveal the character)
Penelope: “That’s enough… you win Cooper”
That’s right… Penelope, the frigen pink wussy, wimpy, nerdy mouse from the third Sly Cooper game!
There’s a frigen plot hole about this character in the fourth game… here we go!
Before I tell you all about it, I’d like to relay the fact that I really liked this character from Honor among Thieves, so if you’re wondering why I’m geeking out about this character... this is why!
So… if you’ve played the third game and you know everything from what the character is saying, doing, and thinking then you’d be able to make a comparison.
Let’s do that, shall we?
First off, when I saw that Penelope was the “Black Knight” it was clever at first, given the fact that we all thought she was working for the “Black Baron” in the previous game when (Gasp!) Low and behold, she was the Baron all along!
When she joined the Cooper gang, she told them that her dream was to fly airplanes and now that she was discovered by Sly, she was more than happy to have joined them in their quest for the Cooper volt.
Now let’s look at Thieves in time.
When I saw Penelope jump out of that robot armor, I thought to myself “What the fah? The mouse… from the third game… that showed no intention, nothing to indicate that she was turning evil is now… immoral?”
This blew my god **bleep** mind when I saw this! Bentley was heartbroken and I was heartbroken / slapped in the face by this turn of events.
SANZARU: “oh, you liked the mousy character that was kind hearted and descent and friendly; you liked when she became Bentley’s girlfriend… HA, HA, we destroyed her character and threw in a plot hole to match!”
I mean, God, Sanzaru! What did you do to this character!!! How and when did the mouse turn into a rat from the third game to the fourth and beyond?!! Seriously, there was no indication, no intention of Penelope ever turning evil, hell, she even defeated a frigen pirate to save Bentley’s life, showing that she was starting to fall in love with the turtle and… a rich skunk character is the one who turns her to the dark side?
What is this, Starwars: episode three?
So, as I play a little further into the game and get to the boss battle point, I began listening in on Penelope’s every word as to why she turned evil.
Bentley: “Why’d you do it, Penelope? You owe me that much, at least”
Yes, Penelope! Tell us why Sanzaru killed your character.
Penelope: “Why? For you, of course! I had to make you see how things could be!”
Bentley: “I’m not going to be one of the bad guys, Penelope”
Penelope: “Ha! Bad Guys? That’s kind of funny, Bentley, seeing as how you work for a thief!”
Umm… weren’t you a thief, too?
Not only that, you loved being a thief when it came to Sly!
Penelope back in the third game: “Anything for Sly… I’d like to see him pull off those athletic moves”
Penelope continues: “But you know the most valuable thing Sly ever stole? Your potential! Together, we can change the world…”
Oh, I thought your dream was to fly an airplane. Of course, when she says for you, she meant for her, given the fact earlier she was talking all sorts of nasty things about Bentley when he was spying on the Black Knight when she revealed herself.
Bentley: “Penelope? But why would she…”
When did this happen again, back in the third game? When exactly did she turn insane?
Penelope earlier: “If only Bentley wasn’t brainwashed by Cooper’s “honorable thief” nonsense! We could’ve made billions in weapon design!”
Yes, that was what she wanted in the third game the whole time… weapon designs!
Penelope continues: “we could have owned the world! No matter – once Cooper’s out of the way, he’ll see things my way. Poor Bentley… He’s kind of cute when he’s being dumb”
Bentley earlier: “Ah… I think I’m going to be sick”
Me, too, in fact, I’m going to look at myself in the mirror and cry!
(Goes to the bathroom and cries / sappy music plays in the background)
Ok, I’m back!
You just… you can’t… I thought… what… who… when… ooooohfgh!
I’m sorry… I can’t get through this in one sitting. I’m going to have to learn to like beer now!
So, so far, Penelope never loved Bentley, her real dream was to build weapons of mass destruction and become a terrorist! I can’t wait to hear more!
Penelope back at the boss battle: “But you’re still chasing after honor for chump change! When are you gonna wake up?”
I’m sorry, I need drop something.
(Fills a glass full of water and drops it onto the floor)
You’d have to play the third game to have better understanding what I’m going through!
Bentley: “so you sold out to Le Paradox for the money?”
Penelope: “No! You’re not listening! He’s just a means to an end!”
That’s right, given the fact that at the ending cut scene in the third game, Sly left a calling card that was worth “millions” in Bentley’s words. So, in fact, she had all of the money she had ever dreamed for, so of course, she’s not in it for the money because at least Sanzaru got one thing right about her!
Bentley: “wow… and I thought you were smart”
She was smart, in fact, if she wasn’t, the gang would have been one turtle short of a member!
So, let’s recap!
1.Penelope hates Sly, even though she had a crush on him in the third game.
2.She wants to take over the world, even though all she wanted to do was get passed the age limit thing to fly a fricking air plane!
3.Penelope didn’t really love Bentley, even though that back in the third game she went up against a pirate to save his life! If she didn’t really like him at all, she would’ve stood by and watched while Captain La Fwee would’ve chopped the turtle’s head clean off!
4.The mouse says that Sly was getting in the way… even though… he was with Carmelita the whole… am I sounding like a broken record?
Penelope: “I’m sorry, Bentley but I guess it’s time to make this brake up official!”
And there you have it! Penelope went from being a sweet, cute and lovable character to being this… oh, and thank for putting a tail on her… but it doesn’t help in explaining how and when she got like this! I swear, Sanazru, either you make her turn good again, or at least explain as to when exactly she… AH! MY BRAIN IS LEAKING FROM MY NOSE! (Sniffs) Get back in there…
Again, I love this game and I know they’re making two more to fill in the “not so obvious” cliff hanger at the end of the first Playstation 3 title of Sly. Of course, if you beat the game with all trophies, you will get to view a hidden cartoon of Sly being stranded somewhere in time.
I love this game, I love the mouse character and I hope something gets done about the plot hole of Penelope turning from this –
Penelope from the third game: “Bentley… I… you” (blushing)
To this –
Penelope from the fourth game: “It’s time to pay the fiddler!”
I’m the “game” Nostagia Critic, I remember it so you don’t have to… and cross that-guy-with-the-glasses reference off my list…
02-16-2013 06:37 AM
02-17-2013 10:55 AM
Yes, you're right! Bob's original cane was stolen by the bear... But still, I wish his bone he was carrying looked at least similar to a cane. I got used to his gameplay… God, he’s still ugly!
As for Penelope, I hope, in the second or third PlayStation 3 title of Sly, that she will turn good once again with a big apology coming from her... even though it should come from Sanzaru saying "Sorry we made the mousy evil... oops"
Maybe Bentley will try to kill her but then she'll be all like "I'm so sorry, Bentley" to the turtle and then he would most likely take her back.
Oh God, please let that happen!
02-17-2013 07:27 PM
02-18-2013 08:36 PM
I hope I get to see the mousy again. You know, when you've seen all sorts of mouse cartoons like Secret of Nimh, Mouse Detective, Stuart Little, An American Tail and of course the T.V. show a lot of people, including myself, like... Redwall, you would think that Penelope would be no different from those other mouse characters. She almost looks like a Disney character if her animation was made into a film.
Her animation in the fourth game during gameplay was cool... but sadly... rest in peace, mousy... we knew you well.
Course you, Sanzaru! Thank God they didn't screw up Sly... too much.
Do you notice that he talks a little louder and more enthusiastic in the fourth game than he ever did in his previous games?